Parenting

Baseball, Barbecue, and Bonding with my Boys

Posted on May 16, 2014 by Chris Euler

Whether or not I want to admit it, there is a good chance my boys will one day have kids of their own. Landon, Elijah, and Everett will have the opportunity to impress the truth of God’s Word on the hearts of their children. The life I am living in front of boys today not only affects them, but also will impact my grandchildren and great-grandchildren. What am I doing to intentionally set aside time for my family? Am I creating space to teach and train my kids in the admonition of the Lord? Do my boys look and say, ‘I want to be like dad when I grow up

A couple of weeks ago, I took my 2 oldest boys, to Atlanta for a weekend of baseball, barbecue, and bonding. My wife and I discussed this opportunity several months ago, and we intentionally set aside time, money, and resources to further my relationship with my boys. It was an incredible experience! After driving 8.5 hours we went to a baseball game Friday night, hung out at the hotel pool on Saturday, watched Captain America 2, and went to another game on Sunday afternoon. On Saturday evening went to Fox Bros Barbecue, one of the highest rated barbecue joints in America.

We were able to let loose the entire weekend. Music was blaring in the car every chance we got. More important than any activity we did or restaurant we ate at was the memories that will last a lifetime. We intentionally had conversations with people at the baseball field, a homeless man outside of the hotel, our waitress at the barbecue restaurant, and the front desk employee at the hotel.

Our laughter was contagious throughout the entire trip! Whether it was in the car, the hotel room, or around the pool, my two boys laughed nonstop all weekend. Even shortly after Elijah got a little bothered by the hot sun during Sunday’s game, he saw the crazy mascots running around the field and laughed hysterically. I realized the importance of letting loose with my boys and showing them what it looks like to experience an exciting, memorable moment!

My boys know how to ask questions! Are we there yet? Why are we not there yet? When are we going to be there? What type of cows are those? Why is that building so tall? How did he miss that ball? How was that not a strike? What is that person eating? Why are they yelling at the umpires? But the one that struck me the most was… Why doesn’t that man have a home? Whether or not they are intentional, my boys look at me as a wealth of information, knowledge, and wisdom! It made me think – what am I filling their minds with? I do not want to brainwash my boys (unless it is about creepy county fairs or cheap all-you-can-eat buffets), but I do desire to raise them in the admonition of the Lord! Am I filling their minds with Scripture? Am I living a life that they would want to imitate?

This weekend made me realize the responsibility God has placed before me! Whether good or bad, I am setting an example to my boys of how I think they should live. How I treat my wife will affect how they treat their future spouse. How I view God will impact their personal relationship with the Father. How I react to circumstances will influence my boys’ reactive responses to issues they face.

As a father, there is a huge weight on my shoulders to live a life worth imitating for the cause of Christ! Fortunately, I have a Heavenly Father who walks me through every step of my life. He has provided the greatest example of what it looks like to be a father of grace, love, forgiveness, and truth! I pray my boys experience those same characteristics in and through the legacy I am leaving them!

Proverbs 4:20-27

“20 My son, pay attention to what I say;
turn your ear to my words.
21 Do not let them out of your sight,
keep them within your heart;
22 for they are life to those who find them
and health to one’s whole body.
23 Above all else, guard your heart,
for everything you do flows from it.
24 Keep your mouth free of perversity;
keep corrupt talk far from your lips.
25 Let your eyes look straight ahead;
fix your gaze directly before you.
26 Give careful thought to the[a] paths for your feet
and be steadfast in all your ways.
27 Do not turn to the right or the left;
keep your foot from evil.”

7 Habits of a Healthy Family

Posted on April 12, 2014April 27, 2014 by Chris Euler

In Revelation 2 & 3, John gives us a glimpse of what a healthy church should look like. Jesus writes letters to 7 churches, encouraging them for the work they were doing, while challenging them in specific areas of needed growth. I believe we can take each one of these letters and gain 7 habits of a healthy family!

1. Keep your love for Christ at the center of everything – The church of Ephesus had lost their first love! As they persevered and endured difficult times, they lost their passion for who God called them to be. Jesus challenged them to remember and live by who He was and what He endured on their behalf.

There are moments within each one of our families that we are faced with extremely difficult circumstances. As I think through the past three years, I often wonder, ‘what’s next? What else could go wrong?’ We find ourselves standing in the shoes of the church of Ephesus. Although we despise evil, we have lost focus of Christ at the center!

As parents, we must never lose sight of what Jesus did for us! As we continue to focus on who He is, our love for Him will grow, no matter what circumstances come our way! Is Jesus at the center of your family? Does He shine through your words and deeds? Do you react to circumstances remembering how Jesus suffered for you?

2. Trust that God has your back – The church of Smyrna was about to face major persecution. Revelation 2:10 says, ‘Do not be afraid of what you are about to suffer.’ They had already faced several other trials, including major poverty. Here was a church that understood how to persevere through adversity, yet Jesus challenges them to not be afraid of whatever persecution may come their way.

What difficult circumstances is your family facing? Are you ever afraid of the ‘what if’? Many of us have lived through those ‘what if’ moments – the times that life does not make sense and nothing seems to go right. Honestly, I fear the day something horrific happens to one of my family members and am blindsided by the unimaginable circumstances of life!

The health of a family cannot be based on possessions or circumstances, but in a trust that God has our back no matter what! He is there for us in the midst of the most difficult times! He promises to never leave us or give up on us. His love covers any fear we may have in regards to the ‘what if’ moments. We must rely on Christ for strength in the moments that are easy and in the ones that do not make any sense!

3. Allow God’s Word to influence your family – Jesus’ third letter was to the church of Pergamum, which found itself in the middle of evil Greek culture. They surrounded themselves with idol worshippers and allowed culture to influence them instead of living for Christ in the midst of culture. Jesus promised to fight their battle for them.

What do people see when they look at your family? Do you speak, act, and live differently than families engulfed in today’s culture? We must allow God’s Word to influence the life of our families. Instead of looking solely to culture, Oprah, modern television, or today’s greatest parenting book, we must allow God’s Word to lead us as a family on mission! It cannot be the latest, greatest idea that leads us as parents and families, but the truth of God’s Word!

4. Setup boundaries based on God’s Word – The church of Thyatira was accomplishing great works in the name of Jesus Christ, but lacked boundaries. They fell into Satan’s lies and deceits as they allowed sin to consume their leadership.

Is your family so focused on doing God’s work, that you will extend your boundaries beyond the direction of God’s Word? Our grace-filled freedom in Christ does not give us the right to sin! We must establish boundaries that keep Jesus at the center of our families. Our relationships must be built around Christ, not on the wisdom of the world.

Thyatira’s place of worship had become a center for sexual immorality. I have come in contact with so many families that have been broken because of sexually immoral actions. In order to live as a family on mission for Christ, we must not fall into the traps of Satan! We must solidify boundaries based on God’s Word in order to keep ourselves from sexual immorality!

5. Be vulnerable and real – To the average person within the community, the church of Sardis appeared alive, but on the inside they were dead! Their actions lacked authenticity. They wanted the spotlight, but lacked faith in Christ. The members of Sardis were fooling the community into believing they had their act together!

Is your family great in public, but a disaster behind closed doors? Do you appear to have your act together when around others? Are you serving alongside your spouse, but talking about getting divorced? We may be able to fool those around us and even ourselves, but we cannot fool God! He knows our family’s heartbeat, no matter what others may think or say about us.

As a father and husband, I have experienced growth in the midst of vulnerability. We must be real with those we come in contact with. I understand there may be times we have to put on a good front as we walk through difficult circumstances, but those around us must also see that we are real people in need of God’s grace!

6. Remain faithful in the little things – The church of Philadelphia was blessed with opportunities to impact their community for the cause of Christ! They were forced to rely on God’s strength and trust in His guidance. God was protecting them from trials and holding them tight. Because of their commitment to Christ, their community was going to experience a radical transformation! Jesus did not have anything against this church because of their obedience to Him. He was going to use them through His strength, not because of what they had or could do.

As a family, are you remaining faithful in the little things? God desires to use you in ways you could never imagine! But he first calls us to remain faithful in minor circumstances and rely on His strength for everything. As Christ remains at the center of our homes, God will bless and use us in ways that do not make sense! Remain faithful in the little things and God will come through in mighty ways.

7. Get off the fence – The seventh and final church, Laodicea, was living on the fence. Revelation 3:15 says, ‘I know your deeds: that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish that you were either one or the other!’ They were living in shame, with one foot in a relationship with Christ and one foot in the world. They based their relationship with Christ on their riches and possessions. Jesus despised them because they were not truly living for Him!

Too many families struggle because they feel pulled in multiple directions. We have become so wrapped up in our busy schedules and possessions that our faith is wavering around Christ instead of centered on Him! We must not live lukewarm lives!

A healthy family strives to have Christ at the center! As the spiritual leaders of our homes, we must never lose sight of who He has called us to be!

Our Kids’ Identity Crisis: Equipping Hearts for Jesus

Posted on March 30, 2014April 1, 2014 by Chris Euler

Where do your kids find their identity? What are you doing to lead your kids to an identity in Christ? Today’s culture leads our kids towards finding identity in relationships, sports, school, or entertainment. It is easy to connect with a movie character or find our identity in what is popular. Because of this, we desire to establish relationships similar to the ones portrayed in Hollywood. Our kids begin talking and acting like the kids in every Disney show, singing the songs that are on Top 40 radio stations, and living out of pursuit of popularity instead of the pursuit of Jesus Christ! I have seen my kids find their identity in their gifts, abilities, and talents. Landon, our 7-year old son, is an excellent baseball player who often centers who he is on his success or failures on the field. If he has a great game – he is a great person to be around; if he struggles, watch out! Our girls struggle to identify with anything beyond what they see on television, hear on the radio, or learn those around them. While establishing a culture of discipleship within our families is of the utmost importance, I do not believe secluding our kids completely from culture and the world around us accomplishes what God desires. This often leads to an identity in legalism or established religion, instead of in a relationship with Christ! As we live out the truth of God’s Word and speak life into your kids, they will begin experiencing identity in Christ! Here are three practical keys to leading your kids

Speak words of affirmation & self-worth – Our kids need to hear words of encouragement, love, and grace. We must use our words wisely as we live out the responsibilities of parenthood. So much of culture preaches and teaches that affirmation and worth are found in success and relationships. Our kids need to know that they are God’s creation, made in His image, and designed to bring Him honor and glory. They do not need to accomplish a list of 100 things to obtain God’s love. It is available to anybody who believes in Him! I have seen so many teenage girls run to a relationship to experience love and self-worth. What are we doing to establish a life of worthiness in a relationship with Christ? Are you speaking words of defamation or words of affirmation?
Establish cultural boundaries – I do not believe that God has called us to seclude ourselves from the entire world. He has not only called us to be in the world, but has also given us the responsibility to reach the world. The Village, one of my favorite movies of all-time, is about a countryside town that isolates itself from the surrounding world. They missed their purpose and placed their identity in their cultural traditions. Within modern Christianity, this can often lead to a legalistic relationship based on rituals, tradition, and rules. It causes us to miss the incredible love, grace, and compassion offered to us in a relationship with Christ! At the same time, I see incredible value in setting boundaries around our kids’ interactions with culture. There are certain shows our children are not allowed to watch. There are certain types of music that we do not listen to. We do not have cable, do not allow our kids to stay the night at a random friend’ house, and do not own a video game system. As our girls get older we will begin working towards a life of modesty and purity, and as our boys mature we will work to impart a life of love and respect. Most importantly, we believe training our children in the admonition of the Lord will help instill an identity in Christ, not culture!
Approach the Heart – I wish I could say I have this one mastered! I want my kids to obey and immediately do what I have asked them to do. I often become so focused on the actions and attitudes that I miss the heart! I want my kids to have the knowledge of who God is, but I often skip from their hearts and go straight from the heads to their hands. We cannot miss our kids’ hearts! There is a time and place for discipline and a time and place to approach the actions, but we cannot miss the attitude of the heart. As we accomplish this, their actions will become a representation of their authentic love for God!

Romans 5:6-11 – “6 You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. 7 Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. 8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. 9 Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him! 10 For if, while we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! 11 Not only is this so, but we also boast in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” Are we living out these words of Paul in front of our kids? Do we believe that while ‘we were still powerless, Christ died for’ us? It is only through a relationship with Christ that we can experience true reconciliation! His love is more affirming than any relationship we will ever know. Abiding in Him gives us purpose and worth that goes beyond anything we could ever imagine. Our kids need to hear these words as well! Lead by example and speak life into your children every chance you get!